Stereotypes
by CrazyBlackCatAnastazia13
Summary: Let's stick various Adventure Time characters into role stereotypes and see what happens.
1. Chapter 1

"MEOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOWL…. _MEOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOWL_ "

'I can't take this anymore.' The blonde thought as she held her now free arms over her ears. She would've used her pillow, but she threw it at the source of the noise, missing when the vocal creature jumped. While thinking of her unfortunate loss, she noticed the noise, which had started obviously hours ago while it was still dark and had seemingly ended when the sky turned gray. Fionna relaxed a bit and tried to fall back asleep. Then startled awake at feeling something jump on her chest.

"Oof! Caaake, what gives?" she groaned.

" _I'm hungry_." Cake stated blandly.

"Then go get something to eat." Was the exasperated response.

"Get me something." The cat pressed as she leaned over to stare more directly at the human girl.

" _Then_ will you leave me alone?" Fionna asked.

Cake stared at her, fluffy tail swishing behind her. Fionna glared.

"Fine." The adventuress sits up, and the cat lands on the floor, on her feet of course. Fionna sleepily makes her way to the kitchen, Cake following behind. Fionna pulls out bread from the pantry, a can of tuna from their weird fridge/freezer/whatever, and starts making a sandwich. After she finishes, she hands the sandwich to Cake, who sniffs it, before munching it daintily. Fionna huffs, and goes back to bed. An hour later, she opens her eyes and has a mini-spaz attack because she can't breathe. She sits up, making spitting sounds trying to get the bits of cream fur out of her mouth. She focuses a glare on Cake, who is sitting on the floor, bathing her paws as if she wasn't maybe inadvertently smothering her best friend in her sleep. Cake looks up at Fionna.

"What?"


	2. Chapter 2

"Finn! Jake! Help me! I need you!" The fair princess screamed from the kitchen.

"Hold on, we're coming Bubblegum!" Finn yelled out to the lady mentioned. Finn and Jake heroically crashed through the door, landing in front of the rubble.

"Princess, we're here to rescu-uuuu you….?" Finn shouted, then questioned. There stood Princess Bubblegum, the skirts, and skirts, and _skirts_ of a pink puffy dress bunched up around her legs as she stood, while screeching, on a chair. Finn and Jake looked on confused, wondering what was scaring the pink young woman.

"Oh thank the stars you're here, heroes, save me from this terrible thing!" Bubblegum exclaimed, pointing down to the floor. Finn and Jake followed the direction her slender finger indicated, to see a small green lizard on the floor in front of the chair.

"Ah, ok, I guess…" Jake said as his hand stretched to the lizard and morphed into a cage over it. Finn found a piece of paper and moved it under Jake's hand to pick up the little reptile, and they both walked out of the room to the open front gates and released the so called 'terrible thing.' When they returned, the princess embraced both of them dramatically, gushing at them.

"My heroes, you have saved me from that green monster!" Princess Bubblegum hugged them tightly, thanking them profusely for 'rescuing' her. Finn and Jake just sat there dumbfounded and unsure of what to do.

"Uh, you're welcome, I guess…" Finn trailed off.

"Yeah, we really didn't do that much…" Jake quietly added.

"Nonsense, tonight we shall have a party in your honor. I, Princess Bubblegum of the Candy Kingdom, declare it!" Bubblegum exaggerated. Finn and Jake were just confused, but happy.


	3. Chapter 3

_Rsh, rsh, rsh, rsh, rsh…..spit_

"Done!" Fionna chirped as she finished brushing her pearly whites. Already wearing her one-peice sleeper-like pajamas, Fionna made her way to her bed to sleep. Cake wasn't ready for bed yet as she was in the other room, talking to Lord Monochromicorn on the phone. Fionna zipped herself in her sleeping bag/sac/thing, and went to sleep. Well, she would have, if she didn't get the feeling of being watched. She sat up, unzipping her upper body, and looking around the room. Nothing was out of place, except for the silhouette at the window.

"Wha…?" the adventuress muttered. She walked closer to the window, to recognize the face of her friend Marshall Lee, the Vampire King. He smiled at her when she approached the window, and it looked friendly, unusual to his usual mischievous smirk. If the grin wasn't enough, he seemed to be wearing a fancy suit and cape. Confused, Fionna opened the window to ask him, 'what the heck, dude?' However, as soon as she opened said window, something about the vampire boy/man/teen/whatever seemed to push her back, and he seemed to glide into the room, despite the fact he entered through an average sized window a couple of feet off the ground.

"Good evening my dear~." Marshall Lee greeted in a strange accent.

"Uh, hey dude. Is everything ok? You're acting super weird tonight." the blonde responded.

"There is nothing out of the ordinary, my pet. My, how lovely your skin looks in the moon light, do you mind if I take a closer look?" The vampire leaned closer as he advanced toward Fionna silently. The girl put her hands on his chest to hold him off.

" _Whoa_ there buddy, I need my space, especially with you acting nutso." She stated firmly.

"Fionna, look into my eyes." This strange vampire commanded gently. Fionna noticed the irises of his eyes looked like they were swirling.

"Marshall Lee, what the heck dude." Fionna looked at him strangely. Marshall suddenly grasped her, moving her hair away from her neck. Before anything else was able to take place, Cake walked in. And proceeded to attempt to maul Marshall Lee to death.


	4. Chapter 4

"Ra-Ra-Ra-Ruff! Ruff Ruff! Woof!"

"Jake, what's going on, what's happening?!" Finn asked as he skidded across the floor as a result of running down the hall to get there. Jake, who was standing, fore-paws/hands on the living room window, kept barking. Finn rushed to the window to see some birds and squirrels in the yard.

"Uh, Jake, I don't see and monsters…"

"The monsters aren't the problem!" Jake continued to bark at the small animals.

"Then what's the problem!" Finn threw his hands up in the air, a typical movement of exasperation.

"I need to go out." Jake stated urgently.

"Um, ok?" Finn half-questioned. He opened the door, and Jake rushed out on all fours, chasing and terrifying the birds and squirrels. Finn watched bewildered, then Jake once more rushed through the open door. Finn closed it, only to turn around and see Jake sitting on the floor, staring up at him.

"What dude?" The young blond adventurer asked the yellow adventurer dog.

"I wasn't finished." Jake said.


	5. Chapter 5

" _One soooong, my heart keeps siiiiinging, of one loooove, only for youuuu~"_

Fionna was reading Adventure Girl magazine, the only magazine for girl adventurers, when she heard melodic singing outside her window. She had gotten up went to the window, only to be absolutely fazed by the sight of Prince Gumball. Because his sleeves were super-puffed like marshmallows (which they probably actually were), he had a sword attached to a brightly colored belt over a white tunic periodically studded with blue gems, fancy boots, and his crown had more gems than before. And apparently he was serenading her.

"Ah, my fair Fionna, how magnificent of you to grace me with your splendid presence. Shall I continue to sing to you, m'lady?" Gumball was certainly acting very off.

"Uh, not that your singing is lame, but why don't you just ask to come in and hang out?" Fionna questioned the even-more-flamboyant-than-usual prince. Gumball stood from his kneeling position and bowed deeply.

"Because I wish to bestow my deepest affections upon my fair adventuress in as many ways as I may." The pink prince replied.

"Uhhh, what?" The blonde could not comprehend this whole 'deepest affection' thing.

"Are you surprised by my announcement? I apologize; I did not mean to be so forward." He bows again. At this point, Fionna is not sure whether to ask him to come in, if he's feeling ok, or to leave. As a good friend, however, she decides to invite him in, only to discover he's vanished. Well, more like she can see him riding off into the sunset on a candy horse.

"O-kay then…"


	6. Chapter 6

" _Prince Gumball_! We're coming for ya dude!" The heroine shouted as she and her cat bashed through the triangular window of the mountain/ice castle. As they stood at the ready, they saw Prince Gumball tied to a chair behind ice bars.

" _Foolish_ _human scum!_ You'll not steal my beloved from me, for _I_ am the Ice Queen!" They also noticed Ice Queen standing at the top of some extravagantly detailed stairs. However, the stairs paled in comparison to the gaudy blue, black, white, silver, red-and-blue-jewel-studded gown and cape the frozen harpy was now wearing , matched to the dramatic ton of make-up on her face, concentrated around her eyes. Being momentarily distracted, Fionna and Cake might've been struck down immediately, if Ice Queen didn't decide to chant something in an ancient language or whatever before throwing ice shards in their direction. Girl and cat flipped out of the way, completely dodging the theatrical attack.

" _RAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGH!"_ Ice Queen screeched at the top of her lungs. She had two reasons. For one thing, she didn't make ice kabobs out of the feminine duo. For another, they just freed Prince Gumball and were trying to make it out of there alive. An icy rain formed and tried to stab the fleeing three. Then the Ice Queen begins to monologue like the idiot villain.

"You _shall not escape_! _I_ , the _Ice Queen_ shall recapture _my_ prince, and you shall _pay_ for your affronts against me." That was about all Fionna, Cake, and Gumball heard after they escaped.


	7. Chapter 7

" _smack"_

Princess Bubblegum sighed, looking down at the egg that had been inadvertently flipped onto the floor. Maybe it wouldn't have been on the floor if Peppermint Butler hadn't have been trying to take the frying pan from her.

"Do not be alarmed m'lady, I shall clean the mess. Please sit down, I shall cook and clean and you shall have your morning meal post-haste." Peppermint Butler bowed deeply and began cleaning the half-fried breakfast food off the vanilla colored kitchen tiles. Bubblegum sighed once again, finally giving up her insistence to do things herself and sat down at the pink kitchen table, on the lace printed cushion of the quaint chair.

' _What is with PepB today?_ _He's never acted quite this…domestic…'_ The sugary sovereign wondered to herself as she watched the mint manservant go from cleaning to disposing to vigorously washing his hands to preparing a gourmet breakfast.

"I now present your breakfast." He bowed once again, placing several dishes that were on a tray onto the table. All of them on a silver platter.

"Your first course, mildly toasted bread, spread with strawberry cream. Your drink, a glass of apple juice. Your second course, a bowl of grain, mixed with sweet cream, sugar, honey-" Really, the list just went on for like 3 minutes. After Peppermint Butler finished talking about food, he then proceeded to put out various utensils.

 _'_ _This is going to be a long day, literally."_ Princess Bubblegum thought as he listed the names and functions of each fork and spoon.


	8. Chapter 8

_Tap tap tap….tap tap tap…._

Finn finally decided to get off his sleepy butt and go see what was making that tapping sound at the window. Once he opened the curtains, he peered out into the navy blue night. Seeing nothing, the blonde boy thought he might open the window to see if somebody was outside on the ground level. However, the moment he cracked open the glass entryway, a smoky, pleasant-smelling mist floated into the room, filling the air. Finn coughed as some of the fragrant cloud entered his nostrils.

" _Finn~ Look at me, my darling~"_ a sensual voice cooed at him. Finn looked around the room royally confused.

"Wha…." The adventurer questioned the smoke-filled air. However, as he turned towards one particularly darkened corner, he saw a silhouette, blacker than the rest of the shadow it stood in. Said shadow stepped into the dim candlelight to reveal Marceline. But Finn covered his eyes when he saw her. The burgundy-, black-, and cream-colored Victorian-styled gown she wore was a little too low-cut. With a strawberry-vanilla color on his skin and a stutter in his voice, Finn voiced a very important statement.

"Marceline, what the _flop_ are you wearing?!"

"Oh Finn, don't you like my dress?" the Vampire Queen purred, draping herself against the wall. Finn chose the wrong to look at her, and payed for it with a scared yelp and an even redder face, covering his eyes hastily. This shameless vampress glided over to him, and, taking advantage of his self-blinding, leant her face towards his currently, rarely exposed neck. Then Jake woke up and let out a distinctly feminine squeal as he flailed around, knocking Marceline out the open window


	9. Chapter 9

" _oof….ok, I got it…almost there….aha! OH! My back!"_

Princess Bubblegum sat up from her desk and walked towards the window that the verbal complaints had been coming from. She looked out the gingerbread trimmed opening and tried to see who was out there. She looked down, and, to her half-surprise, saw the Ice King. Ice King being right outside was a normal occurrence, so she shouldn't have been the least bit surprised. But she was a little surprised, due to the fact he was wearing thick glasses and white plaid pants belted below his ribs, and walking with a cane. Or she assumed he was walking with it previously, because, as of now, he appeared to be using it to scale the pattern of bricks that built her tower. Also, he had apparently made some kind of mistake (other than trying to use a cane to climb a building) and was now helplessly hanging from the bottom end of the cane.

"Hello princess." The Ice King greeted her, as if he had met her on the street, and not perilously perched 40 feet from the ground, underneath a women's window. She sighed, and rolled her eyes, before addressing the foolish king.

"Hello Ice King. What are you doing?" She asked, bored, but also actually curious at his ridiculous action.

"Oh, you know, just, here. And my back hurts. That is you, right princess?" He used his free hand to adjust his glasses.

"Oh yes, it's you."

"I'm gonna get Finn and Jake." She told the sleeping frigid royal. Wait, sleeping? Yes, the Ice King had managed to fall asleep while hanging from a height that would surely kill him if he had fallen literally. Bubblegum sighed, placing a pink hand on her matching pink face, and proceeded to alert Finn and Jake of the not-quite-attempted break-in, and instruct them to put Ice King to bed after they put him back in his own palace.


	10. Chapter 10

_SHING!...clangclangclangSHING!_

"HAVE AT THEE FOUL BEAST!" With one final stab, the monster fell at Finn's feet. The Blonde Wonder raised his sword in triumph, as a round of cheers rose up from the surrounding crowd of spectators.

"He's a hero!"

"You saved us!"

"Our kingdom is free from the Goblin-Dragon!" Rang through the bevy of townspeople who had witnessed the slaying of the tormentor of their civilization. Finn accepted his praise graciously, with respectful nods and bows. Finally, he spoke.

"People of the Brick Kingdom! I thank you for your praise! But please, you do not need to celebrate me for this act, as I wish you all to commemorate the freedom from this beastly creature!" The people cheered once again, and the crowd started moving.

"The hero must celebrate with us!"

"Let him partake of the merriment!"

"His deed shall not go unnoticed!" Jake shifted into a figure of a horse and lifted Finn upon his back, and trotted the pace and direction of the grateful people. Throughout the predominantly rust-red kingdom there was partying, with dancing and drinking competitions and general jollity all around. Finn danced with maidens, calling each by her own name. He partook of the honeyed water (as he was not yet old enough for real mead), contesting with the best of men on who could drink the most; Jake won. Aside from that, Jake raided the snack table, having the time of his life with assorted savory treats. The festivities lasted until the dawn, and in the later morning Finn had bid the people farewell, as he and Jake set off on foot, making their way home.

"Doth thou feel liketh singing any songs?" Finn questioned his canine brother-not-just-in-arms. Jake stretched his arms into the form of a minstrel's lute, shook his head in disgust, then formed a totally righteous electric guitar. He formed another hand to play the flesh instrument. He began to sing in his rock star voice.

"Finn and Jake are some pretty rad dudes! Nobody can beat this radical two! They go everywhere, slayin' monsters left and right! Then they party on through the night! Yeah these bros are pretty radical! And they- they-…" Jake was now talking normal again

"…Did something else that also rhymes with radical…I dunno. Heheh." Jake grinned up at Finn. Finn smiled, and they pressed on towards the sunrise.


	11. Chapter 11

Fionna was making her way downhill, walking fast- well not really, just normal walking, with a fishing rod and a box, deciding to try out fishing, because it seemed fun, kinda. However, as she approached the lake, she spotted something orange by the water. Oh it was Flame Prince/Phoebus! It'd do no harm to say hello, they were pretty _chill_. Besides, they might hang out of fishing got boring. With a smile she continued toward her pal.

"Hey Flame Prince!" She called out, approaching him from behind. His clothes were weird. He was wearing a black leather jacket? And skinny jeans? With converse? She felt like she needed to ask why he wasn't burning his clothes, but when he turned his head to look at her in response to her calling out, he suddenly stood up, his head turned from her with one arm resting over his head dramatically, holding up his other hand in a 'stop' gesture, which stopped Fionna about 2 feet away from him. She quirked a blonde eyebrow.

"Um, what's up du-"

"Fionna, you shouldn't be here with me."

"What?"

"You belong with Cake, and someone who won't end up hurting you like I can."

"What the-"

"I'm dangerous baby."

"Where is this coming fr-?!"

"I'm a monster, you should just stay away."

"I have no idea what you're talking about."

"There's no saving me."

And suddenly, he took off running, away from the lake. Fionna had absolutely no idea what the heck she was supposed to do now. It was kinda too awkward to fish at this lake now. 


End file.
